A New Day, A New Tale of Lust and Intrigue!

Poor, poor Mr. Madison.
If only he had been more clever.

I remember, back in my day when George Washington was president. But I've already told you that story! Now you need to hear about the dear, dear Mr. James Madison. We all had to be very nice to Mr. Madison, because he was retarded. Like his patronizing friend Mr. Jefferson, the children would throw rocks at his head. Unable to stop them from within the confines of his cage, all he could do was grab the bars and shake back and forth while violently groaning and screaming. Mr. Monroe would often leap in front of the cage and scare off the children. Alas, one day an urchin got too close and Mr. Madison ended his life. Shortly thereafter, the lynch mob took Mr. Madison away and we never saw him again.